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Her theme is 'Live like you were dying' what would you do if you only had a year to live........



Journaling:

What if the day comes that the doctor tells me I only have one more year to live. I know that this is very possible, none of know what the future holds. We can be the picture of health one day and in stage three of cancer the next. I don’t like thinking this way and it really isn’t healthy but it is something we all could face. I truly believe we should live each day as though it may be our last. I think there would be more love, more forgiveness and less crime. As a Christian I would be telling more people about Christ and trying to lead them to Heaven. As I look around at friends and family I can’t believe I am so selfish as not to share the Gospel with them. Do I really want them to spend eternity in Hell? What a wake up call that would be to hear I only had a year to live. My main goal would be to see how many people I could tell about Jesus; it should be my main goal now!

I can’t imagine how hard it would be to tell Chuck that the golden years we envisioned watching our grandchildren together would not happen. We would not grow old together and see dreams come true. I would want him to know above all else how much he has meant to me and the unconditional love I have for him. I would tell him I’m sorry for every hurtful thing I’ve said and trying harder to be the wife God intended me to be. If I would be so compelled to tell him then why don’t I tell him know? Isn’t he important enough to share this with now? At this moment I love him more than I ever have, he deserves my all now, not just because I’m dying. Life without Chuck would have been a life wasted; he has brought more to my life than I could ever imagine!

I think the hardest would be to tell Chase and Sarah, I cannot imagine them growing up without me. Who would they run to when they get hurt, only a mom can kiss away the pain? Who will Chase play endless games of Mario with and draw silly pictures with? When he is older who will listen to his ‘girl’ problems and give him advice only a mom would know? Does Chase know I love with my entire being that the moment he was conceived in my body I knew I could not live without him? Now how could he live without me? I would like to say my sweet little Sarah would not understand but I know she would. My precious girl amazes me every day with her intelligence. I am torn inside out knowing I won’t be there when her little body becomes a woman and she needs me to help her sort out those crazy hormones. I pray that God would let me peak through the clouds to see my baby in her prom dress and dance the night away with her high school sweetheart? I pray that it rains on her wedding day and she knows it my tears falling from Heaven to bless her on the most important day of her life. From the moment Sarah was born she has been an incredible gift and has become my best friend. As I sit and write this I know I should hug and kiss my kids more every day. Although I tell them countless times how much I love them I need to show it more in my actions. Most importantly I need to know that they are learning about Jesus and all that He did and still does for them. My only wish for my children is that they know Christ as their personal savior. I may have to leave them in a short while but to know I will spend eternity with them is worth it all.



I know it would be unbelievably hard to hear those dreaded words but I know I could handle it. I have complete faith in God that He will put His arms around us and take care of all our needs! But the question is ‘what if’ not ‘I do’ have only one year to live. I need to wake up every morning with the mission to share Christ with one person and love my family more than the day before!